Smiling Down
by el saintx
Summary: every time I smile, sometimes it is hard for me to look up ... something missing, but what is it? - Nico Y. / Powered by Google Translated / Sorry for bad grammar inside.
1. Niko puri Joshi dou

**DISCLAIMER:** _**Love Live! School Idol Project**_ is a Japanese multimedia project co-developed by ASCII Media Works' Dengeki G's Magazine, music label Lantis, and animation studio Sunrise. August 2010 / _**Love Live! School Idol Diary**_ is Written by Sakurako Kimino. Copyright © 2013 ASCII Media Works / Words is _**Smiling Down**_ by Pillar. Copyright © 2008 Essential Record. All rights reserved.

 **Tag Notes:** Special Story of Love Live!: Super Idol Warrior, Nico Childhood, Family, No Pair, Friendship. **POV** : Nico Yazawa

* * *

 **Chapter 1: Niko puri | Joshi dou (Nico puri | Girl's Path)**

 **.**

 _You make it so hard on yourself, But theres nobody else_

 _That could ever understand, The feelings that you felt_

 _I could hear you think about, All the time I was around_

 _If you could only see me now, I'm right here looking down_

 **.**

* * *

 **.**

 **On Sunday morning, Nico wake up earlier than usual, it seems she was in a hurry to go somewhere. That day in her apartment there is only Nico alone. Her mother seemed to go along with her sisters without her in early morning. But it seems it does not disrupt Nico because she has her own agenda today.**

.

* * *

 **7 Years ago**

 **.**

" _Nico nii, nico nii, nico nico nii_ _"_

" _Nico nii, nico nii, nico nico nii_ _"_

.

"Mou... Dad stop it!... I'm not a kid anymore!" Said the little girl with twintail hair that look so annoyed by the act of her father who was beside her.

 **'Nico Nico Ni',** it is a song that often sung by her father for his daughter Nico Yazawa, 10 years old, 5 th grade. That afternoon, Nico Dad went to pick up her daughter who was in the playground alone. With curiosity her father approached her and tried to comfort her.

"Hahaha... I'm sorry," the father said with a laugh. "Ermmm... Nico-chan, is there any problem at school?"

"Just tell it to me..." Her father with gently approached her and caressed her daughter warmly.

Nico then raised her head and looked at her father with a cold stare, "I do not want to go to school again starting tomorrow!"

"Ehh... why?" Said her father was shocked.

"They are evil... they mock me as shorty." Said Nico briefly with her face sullen. "I am annoyed!."

"Ohh... and then?" Her father also replied briefly.

"They were right. You were really short", Her father looked at her daughter with smiling eyes.

"Dad!" Response Nico angry

"Just joking... hahaha..."

"I'm really cranky ya know...!", Said Nico with exasperation.

Nico Dad then hugged her head into his arms gently. Nico could feel the warmth of the body of the father which is in contact with the skin directly.

"But you know Nico-chan?" Her father went on to say while still holding her. "You're a cute girl... Really!... That's why daddy love you."

.

* * *

 **It is the umpteenth time my dad was always there to cheer me on when I feel sad. Today at school I was following sports lesson, the lesson I hate most. Actually, it does not mean I do not like sports, anyway. It's just this lessons that always makes me sweaty and smelly. That is why I often make an excuse to ask for permission to go to the infirmary every time the sports lesson begins.**

 **Liar? Uhh... get caught, huh?. But really, I really really hated sports lesson until today. That afternoon, our sports lesson is about the relay race. Actually it's just the usual relay anyway, as usual we were divided into several groups squads, but that all changed when our sports teacher announced that there will be a prize for the fastest team group. As a result each group run become increasingly eager to be the winner and the instant sports lesson into the match race of life and death. And I'm stuck in this battle. Shit!**

 **Long story short, my group was decisively defeated in this race and I were accused of being the scapegoat for this defeat. They blame me for my short body so that my running became too slow and detrimental to the team. Well, that's my life in school every day.**

* * *

.

 **After Dinner at Home**

.

"Ahh... Nico-chan, your mom will come home tomorrow." Nico's father said while cleaning the dishes in the kitchen.

"Really?!..." Nico shouted excitedly.

"Ehh, I mean... So what?" Suddenly her voice flat.

Nico's father who had finished tidying up the kitchen and then went to her daughter, she was busy doing homework in her room, "You still mad at your mother huh?"

"No, really!" Nico replied in a flat voice, without looking at her father.

.

"Nico-chan, your mother is a strong woman, you know ..." Her father said, looking at a family picture frame on the Nico desk. "Indeed, she rarely went home but it was because of her job duties as a stewardess."

"Did not you supposed to be proud to have a mother who often get on a plane and traveling abroad?" Said Father Nico with a smile. Nico quiet for a moment after hearing the words of her father.

"But... But she was never there for me !" Nico replied with a trembling voice.

"I HATE MAMA !" Nico ran out of her room to leave her father in tears.

* * *

.

 **Mama, all this time I rarely saw her present in my life. She worked as a stewardess on an international aircraft company because of that she rarely went home for months. In fact she did not come on my birthday yesterday, I wondered if she had forgotten to have children because of her busyness of work.**

 **She also did not attend to my school on the mother day. when my school friends came forward to give a gift to her mother, only I were handed a gift to my father. Actually, I already told my father to not come to school, but he still insisted on coming. He said that because he is a parent too then he is entitled to come to the school as represent my mother. Honestly, I'm actually embarrassed because of my father's behavior.**

 **.**

* * *

 **In front of the Gate School**

.

"Dad?", Nico surprised to see her father being in school during school hours.

"Hello, Nico-chan ...", Greeting her father.

"Dad, why you here?", Asked Nico with wonder. So far, Nico is always back to home alone therefore she was shocked upon seeing her father to pick her up at school.

"Here, it is..." Her father handed her two pieces of paper tickets.

 **"This is it? Don't tell me!"** Nico surprised to see the sheet ticket on her hand. It is the ticket concert of her favorite idol group, " **SP-A!** _(called: Special A_ )" Which this weekend will hold a concert tour near her home.

" **Yes, this is a concert ticket "SP-A!"!** Your favorite idol group, right? Hehehe... "Her father replied with an odd laugh.

"Isn't this tickets already SOLD OUT?! How come you can get it?", Asked Nico curious.

"It's.. It's not a big deal... hahahaha..." Her father replied with a grin. "So, are you want to watch it? It VVIP tickets you know!"

"OF COURSE! I LOVE YOU DAD ", Nico jumped hugging her father in happy.

.

* * *

 **After concert SP-A!**

.

 _"Come on, Baby! Dancing dancing higher... Let's Go! Sweety, Love is waiting now... ",_ Nico repeat to sing that song in all the way to go home.

"Hmm... You really liked that song, Nico?", Asked Nico Father.

"Hehehe..." Nico laughed. "Umm, Are you also enjoyed this concert, dad? It is one of my favorite idol group you know!"

"Of course... that's why I took you there, Nico.", Her father replied with a smile.

"Although I did not understand their song anyway... hahaha..."

"Dad, you old..." said Nico with sound cynical.

"It can't be help!... Hahahaha..." Her father replied with an awkward body gestures

"Hoaaaeeemmm..."

"Sleepy?" Asked her father. Nico nodded silently. "Come on up to the Dad back."

"Thanks Dad..." Nico then picked up by her father during the return trip.

"Good night, my sweet heart."

.

* * *

 **At Nico House**

.

"You're late coming home", says one woman who was standing at the front door of the Nico house.

"Well, There are very much additional Encore songs in that concert, thats why...", Nico's father replied.

"So, are she liked it?" ,Asked the woman.

" **VERY... VERY LOVED IT!** ", said Nico Father excited.

"Ssshhhh.. Keep low your voice down... I just lull Kokoro and Kokoa." Replied that woman.

"Thank goodness, then." She smiled. "I was lucky one of their idol group members who boarded with my plane and give me tickets to their concert for free"

"So, are you going back to work right now?" Asked Nico Dad. That woman only nodded her head.

"At least you should hand over the ticket by yourself. you're her mother, after all?!"

"It's okay.", Replied Nico Mom. "After all, she already hate me."

"I leave now, honey." Nico's mother left home late at night to get back to work. She not forget took time to kiss her husband and her children that had been dormant.

"You are wrong, my dear.", said Nico Father with a somber voice.

* * *

.

 **That was the last time I and my father went along to go to a concert together. Not long after that I learned that my father was diagnosed have blood cancer leukemia by doctors. Mama decided to stop being a stewardess and work at home while caring father. At that moment, I could feel how it feels to have an intact family. I guess...**

* * *

 **a/n:** Name "SP-A!" is the only name of my main group in LL!SIF. Do not mind at all... XD


	2. Egao No Yakusoku

**Chapter 2: Egao No Yakusoku (The Promise of Smile)**

.

 _I know you won't forget, All the time we got to spend_

 _Just because it's been a while, Doesn't mean that its the end_

 _So right here and now, I'll swear you a vow_

 _That I will always be with you, Whenever you feel down_

.

* * *

 **On the morning, In Nico House**

.

"Nico-chan, let's wake up, sweety...!", Nico Mom woke Nico who still fell asleep in the morning.

"Please take care your little sister Kokoro and Kokoa.. Mama would go to the market for a while."

* * *

.

 **It was Sunday, and as this is my activities every day which became a baby sitter for my two sisters, Kokoro (4 years) and Kokoa (3 years). Actually I do not really like to spend my time with them at home, but since my father was admitted to hospital to undergo his treatment therapy, I inevitably had to accustom myself to help my mother take care of them.**

.

* * *

"Onee-chan, when dad come home?", Asked Kokoro, Nico little sister number one.

"Onee-chan, actually where is daddy now ?", Kokoa, little Nico sister number 2 also asking Nico while busy playing her toy, _"Whack-A-Mole_ ".

"Dad... Dad definitely will return. You don't have to worry, we will surely to meet with Daddy soon." Nico replied with a cheerful voice.

"That's why you have to grow up to be good and healthy and smart."

"Allright sis..." They said they two together.

* * *

.

 **It is the umpteenth time I lied to my sister. Actually, I also found out about my father's health condition that getting worse from time to time. Every night I could hear my mother crying and praying to God to ask for healing daddy. I do not know what to do. I felt useless in this family.**

.

* * *

 **July 22, 2008**

.

"Happy Birthday Nico-chan!" My mother said as she lit a candle on a birthday cake.

"Happy Birthday, Onee-chan!" Both my sister also congratulated me.

.

* * *

 **This morning I was shocked by the surprise party that has been prepared by the mother and both my sister shortly after I wake up. I feel happy that for the first time I can celebrate birthdays together with my mama and my two sisters. But... I felt there was something lacking in my 11th birthday.** **My dad is not here.**

* * *

.

"Thank you Mama", I took a birthday cake and blowing the candle flame above it.

"Thanks Kokoro, Kokoa", I unconsciously crying, there is a tear were running down my cheek.

.

* * *

 **At The Playground.**

.

 _As usual on afternoon I went to the playground alone sitting in my favorite swing, looking at the evening sky._

"Hwoaaahh ... boring.", I said with a sigh.

"Even in this birthday, I still not allowed to visit my father in the hospital! Suck! ", I complained while bowed my head. Not long ago I saw a large shadow of someone behind me. I turned my head toward the back and saw someone getting closer to me.

"Hmm ... who are you?! A Clown?!", The man wearing a clown costume Winnie The Pooh, I think he might be a clown who work in this park.

"Gift?", Clown was issued a gift from his waist bag and gave it to me.

"For Me?"

 _I held the clown giving gifts. With curiosity I opened the gift and ..._

 **"DUAAARRR !"** _(explode sound)_

 _I was very surprised to know there is a small firecracker inside that gifts. In a state which a little chaotic I saw the clown that actually appear're laughing at that even though he did not make out a sound._

" **GO AWAY YOU STRANGER!** ", I snapped him to left me alone, but that clown did not budge instead he mimicked my every move. That made me even more angry.

I ignored him and went to where the swing but he also followed me to go there and swinging side. I went to the sandbox, but that clown also stays following me playing on there. It really bothers me.

 **"STOP! STOP FOLLOWING ME OR I WILL SCREAM!",** I threatened that clown. But instead of a clown was gone instead he drew near me, very close and then... He grabbed my arm and sprinting!.

 **"HELP ME! I was kidnapped!",** I screamed asking for help, but the people who were there instead smiling and laughing at me.

"This is not good !" I thought. I was so too panic, I even closed my eyes and did not pay attention to see where the clown was going to take me away. Shortly afterwards, the clown suddenly stopped and I opened my eyes.

.

.

"It's...", I gasped upon seeing that place.

.

.

.

 **"It's Fantasy Dreamland!"**

* * *

 _ **"Fantasy Dreamland!".**_ _It is an amusement park in my region. I often go to this place every day of the holidays with my father and my sisters. I do not know whether to feel happy or horrified now because I am currently going with strangers who kidnap me. But after being at the playground is directly made to drift with the fun atmosphere there so that I involuntarily immediately headed to the game rides._

 _The clown rides me to go to every place of my favorite game rides. He really understands all of my favorite rides. To be honest, I find this screwy but I thought it is just a coincidence._

* * *

.

After playing then we take a break on an empty bench.

"Hahaha... I'm pleased !"

"You know Mr. Clown... Actually today is my birthday. I and my father would always go here on my birthday. But for this year I could not do it... My father was ill and hospitalized." I tell my feelings to Mr. Clown, for some reason I felt very comfortable to be at his side even though we had just met.

"I'm afraid can not able to meet with him in the next year"

"Hmm... hey, kids...", Suddenly Mr. Clown spoken for the first time. "You want a balloon?"

"Ehh?", I saw him holding a pink balloon and give it to me.

"Thank you", I said as I received the gift of his balloon.

"You know why this balloon can fly?", Mr. Clown began to speak. "It is because there is a light helium gas that fills the balloon, that why it can fly."

"Did you know that the helium gas also can make other people laugh. If you inhale this gas then your voice will shrink like a baby, and it's very funny at all... Hahahaha...", Mr. Clown laughing while taking a balloon again for himself.

"Human is like that, they also need a lot of laughs to be able to fly any problems they have."

"I have many expect to you, Nico-chan."

* * *

.

 _ **Ehh ... he know my name? But how can?**. _

_Mr. Clown then release his mask head._

 _._

* * *

" **NO WAY! DAD?!",** I looked him with a hesitate eye.

"Hi, Nico-chan ... Long time not see you, right? Happy birthday!, "My father smiled

" **WHY**?", I snapped at him.

"Eeh..." My father was shocked.

" **WHY ARE YOU HERE?** Aren't you supposed to be in the hospital now? "I scolded him.

"That's... That's not a big deal... Hahahaha..." My father said with a laugh awkwardly.

"What's so not a big deal?! You ran away from the hospital, right?!"

"Maybe? Hehehe... "Said my father awkwardly. I've been perplexed by my father's actions.

"Dad... why are you doing this?", I asked in a low voice.

"Nico-chan, it's because daddy will never be able to forget your birthday," he said.

I was stunned to hear that answer.

"Nico-chan, do you know why daddy gave you the name Nico? That's because I want you to grow into a child who was always smiling under any circumstances, therefore, can you promise me one thing?", Asked my father.

"Whatever happens in the future, no matter how bad you face any problems, Nico must be a child who is always cheerful! OK!", My father closes his words with his thumb finger. With great compassion, I hugged my dad while give signaled hand "OK!" to him.

* * *

.

 **On that day, my father took me to go to the amusement park to celebrate my birthday as usual until the late night. The next day my father receiving intensive care in hospital. As expected, the head of hospital nurse scolded my father about his reckless behavior.**

 **Not long ago, Mama got a notice from a doctor that she was pregnant of 3 months, for me it is a very happy news. Daddy really has given a great gift to our family because it is a boy. My father asked to give his name Kotaro.**

.

* * *

 **And then one month later... My father passed away.**

* * *

.

 **It was a very tough day for me. There is nothing more painful than to see the death of my dad who had gone forever in this hospital room. My mother and my sisters help each other to serve every guest who came to mourn at the funeral hall. Needless to say, our family is really lost in grief whenever there are guests who began to speak in memory of my father. However, I've promised him I would not cry on the day of his mourning. Therefore I still smile in front of the guests.**


	3. I'll Smile For You

**Chapter 3: I'll Smile For You**

 **.**

* * *

 **7 years later.**

.

"Hoaaammm... What a sunny morning!"

On a Sunday morning, there is one Miko, a girl who keep the Shinto shrine are preparing herself to clean up the courtyard of Kanda Shrine. Apparently she realized that she was not alone in this temple. She looked up and saw that there is a little girl with a long hair straggling was praying in the front of temple.

"Hmm ... isn't she?"

"Nico-chan!", She exclaimed to this girl who had been finished her praying.

"Nozomi?" Said Nico wonder.

"What a surprise you come to the Kanda Shrine? What are you praying for?", Asked Nozomi with wonder.

"Araaa... this place is known as the temple of love, a suitable place for those who pray to ask for a mate or to pray for the person she loves. Don't tell me...! Nico-chan, you're in love, right?! hihihi..."

"What the hell! Do not talk nonsense, Nozomi.", Nico snapped to her with red blushing face.

"C'mon... Please tell me, Nico-chan. We're friends, right!", Urges Nozomi.

 **"IT'S SECRET."** Nico replied briefly. After hearing that, Nozomi immediately put to her hideous face.

"If you do not immediately tell me then it will I give you my special jutsu ...", Her hand was ready to "explore something" in Nico body.

.

 **"WASHI-WASHI SURU YAN!"** _(grope)_

 _._

 **"GYAAAA... YOU PERVERT!",** Nico shouted loudly when Nozomi groping her breasts with full of passion.

 **"I GIVE UP... STOPPP IT ... !",** After hearing Nico who had given up so Nozomi stop her action.

"So?", Nozomi smiling grin while waiting for an answer from Nico who currently busy holding both of her breasts were in pain now.

"I'm still not going to tell you, but it's true that I was praying for the one person I love.", Nico replied as she lowered her head. However, it can be seen that Nico eyes slightly swollen at this moment like being hold back her tears. Nozomi then getting closer to Nico and holding her hair.

"Nozomi! What do you want to do to me! "Ask Nico with anxiety.

Nozomi then pulled out a ribbon from her pocket and begin to smoothing Nico hair, "Nico-chan, your hair are being look so messy today. I'll tidy it up."

"Ehh, No need!" Nico said while holding Nozomi hand. But Nozomi still continue her action until Nico stopped to resist.

"It's Done!" said Nozomi cheerfully when she finished tidying Nico hair. Now it appears that Nico had twintail hair as usual.

"You know Nico, Hair is a crown for women that why it's not good if a long-haired girl did not beautify her hair." Nozomi told to Nico.

"I paired the ribbon to keep your hair look better. But not only that, this ribbon also have the spiritual ability to light up feelings and your heart. Just think of it as a talisman! "She said with a smile.

"But that's not what I meant, what matters is if you have something in your heart, then you have to express it clearly. "

"I think your dad would be sadder if he knew that her daughter was closing her true feelings with a fake smile."

"Ehh... How do you know?" Suddenly Nico becomes shocked when she heard Nozomi are talking about dad.

"These cards that speaks to me", Nozomi said with a smile

"Nico-chan, if you want to do something then do it all by heart. Laugh with heart, and cry with heart!"

"Because even though your father was no longer in this world right now, but you still have friends who will cheer you up, including me."

Nico became froze upon hearing the words of her best friend. she realized that all of her behavior all this time is not something she should do. Nico always hold back her feelings with a smile because of her promise to her father.

But that day, Nozomi has opened her eyes that she was not supposed to keep her feelings alone. Deep inside herself, she felt that all of her friends have helped herself over the years.

At that time, Nico with tears in her eyes and soulful emotion ran to embrace Nozomi tightly. Nico releasing all the emotions that she had been holding for 7 years to her best friend.

* * *

 _._

 _So next time that you feel like crying_

 _Next time you don't feel like trying_

 _Just remember I'll be right there_

 _Smiling down on you_

 _._

 _In the morning you don't feel like rising_

 _Next time you feel like compromising_

 _Just remember I'll be right there_

 _Smiling down on you_

 _._

* * *

 **It was the first time I could cry out after all this time I was buried my heart. Nozomi right, whenever I feel sad I should not have to bury my feelings, I should laugh with my head raised toward the sky and saw my father in heaven smiling down at me.**

* * *

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

* * *

 **.**

 _ **Isn't that Right?, Dad.**_

 **.**

* * *

 **A/N:** Thank you for reading this story. I apologize if there is a typing error in spelling and grammar. perhaps this story is my first and the last one in English. This story actually is part of my next future chapter on **"Love Live: Super Idol Warrior"** (bahasa indonesia, ongoing). I hope you guys want to read it too

 **I get the idea of this story about 6 months ago after reading a review of Love Live! School Idol Diary: Nico Yazawa. Interestingly, the draft of this story finished at Father's Day. Therfore, the focus of this story is about the father and daughter relationship, i think this theme still rare in here.**

Furthermore, this story is completed to coincide with the news that "Nico House" in parallel world -real world- "The Shohei Bridge Building" will soon be destroyed. (Sorry to hear that, but it was funny! XD)


End file.
